Let’s be honest here; being a mom 24/7 is not all fun and games filled with peaceful smiles. It’s rather exhausting, frustrating, and aggravating, especially when our kids are frustrated, exhausted, and aggravated…and that’s just the beginning of the list…right?
I’ve never been a happily-ever-after fairy tale kind of gal growing up. SubhanAllah, I’ve always been optimistic in faith, and realistic in practice, even before I became a Muslim. However, I was overjoyed and NOT surprised at all that magic and hoping for magical endings is haram. It just served as another little sign to me, that I was destined to be Muslim, Masha’Allah.
So, when our kids try our patience like screaming tears of pain after having spent all night up with a fever or when our kids debate or disobey us; please keep these important ayats of the Qur’an close by:
Those who spend (in Allah’s Cause) in prosperity and in adversity, who repress anger, and who pardon men; verily, Allah loves Al-Muhsinun (the good-doers). [Qur’an 3:134]
The good deed and the evil deed cannot be equal. Repel (the evil) with one which is better (i.e. Allah orders the faithful believers to be patient at the time of anger, and to excuse those who treat them badly) then verily he, between whom and you there was enmity, (will become) as though he was a close friend. [Qur’an 41:34]
Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish (i.e. don’t punish them). [Qur’an 7:199]
Animals have instincts to fight (physically) and react, while people have intelligence. We have the ability to use words and resist reacting (physically or verbally). As Muslims, we have a duty to obey Allah subhanahu wa Ta’ala, so acting righteously during aggravating, angry moments becomes ibadah, acts of worship.
I always share with other mommies, that WE are the mommies; they are the kids. We cannot become kids when they need us most. We need to be the mom who they desperately need, one who can deal with them with loving tenderness and patience (even when you have little to no patience left). Because if we’re not there when they need us most (in physical or emotional pain), who else will they turn to? The TV? A non-Muslim teacher? An inexperienced peer? Isn’t our goal after all to become of Al-Muhsinun (the good-doers)?
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